Chapter 7
“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.”
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
January 2012:
“Well I guess this is it.” Rob smiled small. “I guess this is where we say goodbye.”
I nodded once before hugging him. “Thank you so much for everything Rob. I wouldn’t have made it very far without you. You kept me sane when I wanted to rampage.”
He chuckled and kissed my forehead. “You’re like a little sister to me, I hope you’ll visit sometime in the future.”
I sighed. “Of course I will.”
I heard footsteps jogging towards us and I turned around and opened my arms just in time for Trey to crash into them. He nuzzled his face in my neck and hugged me close. I tried to move away but he refused to let me go.
I heard Rob laughing from behind us and Trey let me go.
He wasn’t wearing his cardigan; his arms were cold and bare without it. He was clutching it in his grip tightly and eventually he handed it to me. I frowned and shook my head but he insisted.
“No, keep it please. I’ll sleep better at night knowing that you have it.” He whispered.
I smiled. “I’ll sleep better beside it.”
He sighed heavily and then grabbed my hand tight. “It’s all come so quickly. I don’t want you to leave yet.”
I nodded once. “I don’t want to leave yet.”
He hugged me with one arm and kissed my cheek. “I wrote down my phone number and email. When I get settled on the outside I’ll text you my address and you can visit or something. I don’t know we’ll work something out.”
I nodded and grinned before handing him a little piece of paper with my phone number and email. “Now you’ve got someone to use your daily phone calls on.”
He laughed and pulled me into him again. “God, I love you.”
I shifted in his arms and stood up on my tiptoes and kissed his lips one last time. “I fucking love you too.”
“Alright you two, enough is enough.” Rob smiled. “It’s time to go, Laurel.”
I nodded once and gave Trey one last squeeze before I let Rob lead me down the hall, towards the front door. I looked back when I got to the gate and waved to him. He was close to tears, I could tell. I sighed and shook my head before mouthing ‘goodbye’.
The moment I got outside there was no way of seeing inside the centre and it was like reality had slapped me in the face. Rob buckled me inside the passenger seat of his car and when he started the engine I jumped. It had been a whole year since I’d sat in a moving car. He drove out the driveway and through the electric fence and then we were on the road again, back in civilisation.
“I’m going to take you back to my place first.” He told me.
I frowned. “You mean you don’t live there?”
He rolled his eyes. “Very funny but no, I don’t. Anyway, I’ll let you get changed and all that. Prepare for the reunion.”
I groaned. “I think I like prison better.”
“You won’t be saying that when you have a glass of coffee and a piece of my famous red velvet cake.” He told me.
I forced a laugh but all I could think about was the cardigan in my hands. I brought it close to my face and breathed it in. It smelt exactly like Trey did. I wasn’t aware that he had his own scent until now. I couldn’t even describe it. It just smelt like him. Like home.
I wrapped it around my shoulders and turned up the radio, listening to music that I’d never heard before. It was hard to imagine just how much I had missed.
“I sort of wish I hadn’t said goodbye.” I said quietly.
Rob turned to me. “Why?”
I shrugged. “Because it made it seem more real. More permanent. Like it just highlighted the fact that I might never see him again.”
He started driving slower as we got closer to his house. “If there’s any advice I can give you at all, it’s this. Hang in there, Laurel. Don’t give up. Clean yourself and invent someone new. Be polite to the Pots’ and stop causing trouble. And then when the time comes, he’ll be out and you go from there. Just don’t fuck things up for yourself again. You’ll be eighteen in like a year and a bit then you’ll be free to do whatever you want. It’s just two months, hang in there.”
I sighed and settled into the seat just as we pulled up the driveway. “I’ll try.”
When we got inside I had a shower and cleaned myself properly before changing into a fresh pair of leggings, a long and baggy singlet and Trey’s cardigan. Rob had given me some fluffy bed socks and I pulled them onto my feet before tying my hair up in a messy bun.
I felt more together being dressed and fresh. I walked out the bathroom and sat down at the bench where Rob had a plate of cake and a big mug of coffee waiting for me.
“Thanks.” I mumbled.
He smiled small. “I know how you feel about leaving him, but don’t worry I’ll look after him.”
I nodded. “I know you will but I’m going to miss him.”
“You’ll see him again.” He tried to assure me.
I shook my head and sighed. “No, no I won’t.”
He rolled his eyes. “Stop stressing, they’ve agreed to cooperate. It’s only a year.”
“And then what?” I asked. “I can’t do all of this on my own. I wanted to go to school and I wanted to get a good job and I wanted to be able to support myself but I won’t be able to go to university without somewhere to stay and I won’t be able to have somewhere to stay without money and if I get a job I’ll have no time to go to school.”
He sighed heavily. “I know. But you get paid from the government every week and even though it will drop a little when you turn eighteen you’ll still get the money.”
I bit my lip. “And if I get a job…?”
He shrugged. “The money should stay the same but only if you’re on like minimum wage.”
“And school, school is expensive.” I sighed.
“I’ll help you get a scholarship or something, I don’t know. Whatever we do, we’ll work it out.” He smiled, trying to encourage me. “Nothing is going to be as bad as you’re making it.”
I nodded slowly. “I know but it’s a long time and I’m not even sure that I can make it to my seventeenth birthday.”
He gave me a look. “Come on, that’s only a month away. Surely you can do that.”
“I’ll try.” I breathed tiredly.
He stood up. “Come on are you ready to get home? You look exhausted.”
I scrunched up my face. “Depends, will I be allowed to visit Trey tomorrow?”
He rolled his eyes. “I’ll pick you up when I leave for work in the morning. But you know unless you’re immediate family you won’t be able to see him every day.”
I nodded once. “I know. That’s why I’ll be writing him letters.”
*
The second I walked through the front door Mr and Mrs Pots met us with grumpy smiles. Mr Pots shook Rob’s hand while Mrs Pots directed me inside and to what used to be my bedroom. I once had posters, photos and writing all over my walls but they were now bare. The CD stack that I had was now gone and the only remaining thing was a bed and a chest of drawers.
“We weren’t expecting you to come back but we kept all of your things.” She smiled at me.
I shrugged. “Thanks, I guess.”
Rob stood at the door with a smile. “I guess this is goodbye.”
“For now.” I told him.
He nodded once. “I’ll pick you up tomorrow.”
Mrs Pots frowned. “What do you mean?”
He smiled. “I have some filing for her. It’s part of her sentence, a bit of community work.”
Mr Pots appeared from behind with a strangely happy smile. “That sounds like a good idea a bit of time out of the house might be good for you. But make sure you’re back here before three because we have an interview with your old principal.”
Rob smiled and nodded. “Of course, well I’ll see you tomorrow.”
I gave him a hug. “Bright and early.”
We all sat down in the kitchen and their biological daughter, Melanie, sat down with us. She was nice enough but we didn’t really have anything to do with each other. I didn’t really have anything to do with any of them.
“Don’t bother signing me up for school, Caitlin.” I told her with a sigh. “I’m not planning on going back there.”
She frowned. “Well what else are you going to do?”
I shrugged. “I don’t know, I’ll discuss that with you tomorrow. I don’t want to get into that tonight.”
“Mel, why don’t you go out or something?” Caitlin sounded very stressed.
Mr Pots, Angelo, nodded. “Yes, I’ll even give you some money.”
She rolled her eyes. “I get it, the criminal is more important than I am.”
Caitlin shook her head. “You know that’s not true, there are just a few things that we need to sort out.”
I smiled at Melanie. “Go on then, see a movie or something.”
She glared at me as she walked off.
“I don’t want to be here.” I said simply. “But apparently it’s not up to me.”
Angelo nodded once. “You’re right. It’s not. It’s not up to us either.”
I sighed. “Basically you’re not going to sign me into school, you’re going to let me go and help Rob and you’re going to help me out where I need it like good foster parents. Also, it’s my seventeenth birthday in a month and I’m requesting a car.”
“You’re joking, right?” Caitlin shook her head. “There’s no way we’re going to buy you a car.”
I smiled sweetly. “Look at it this way, the sooner I get a car, the sooner I’ll be out of this house.”
Then I stood up and wandered into my bedroom, leaving them to think about what I’d just said. I didn’t bother unpacking my boxes. I didn’t want to bother turning my room back into what it was; it wasn’t really my thing anymore.
An hour later the sun had gone down and I could smell food cooking. Caitlin called me into the lounge room and I walked in ready for dinner but instead she handed me the phone.
I frowned. “Who is it?”
She shrugged. “I don’t care, he wants you.”
I grabbed the phone from her and sighed. “Hello?”
I knew who it was the second he let his breath out. I smiled and ran into my bedroom. “Trey?”
He laughed. “How did you know?”
“I just knew.” I grinned even wider. “Is everything okay?”
“Yeah.” He told me. “Rob just got back and he said he was bringing you in tomorrow.”
I nodded even though he couldn’t see me. “Yeah, I’ll be back inside the walls already.”
I could hear noise in the back ground, people talking, waiting for their phone calls. “I can’t wait to see you, it’s weird not being able to talk.”
I smiled. “I know it’s so lonely here.”
“Were your family glad to have you home?” He asked me.
I rolled my eyes. “You’re joking right?”
I heard him sigh. “I’m sorry.”
I shrugged it off. “Don’t worry about it. I just can’t wait to see you tomorrow.”
There was a bang on the other line and I groaned. Trey swore at something and then I heard his voice again. “I have to go, I’ll see you tomorrow. I love you.”
“I love you too.” I whispered, but the line had already rung dead.
‘