The ride back home is pleasant with Ed Sheeran's Perfect playing in the background and New York City adorned with snow and city lights made a spectacular sight taking me to a faraway la-la land.
Jason cleared his throat a couple of times and that pulled me back from my daze. I turned to look at him. His one hand on the steering and the other scratching the back of his neck, his eyes narrowed together deep in thought.
He turned towards me for a second and again turned back to face the road. He cleared his throat again.
What is wrong with him? Did he want to ask me something or is he coming down with flu or something?
"So you can fight back now?" He asked me casually still eyeing the road.
"Huh?" I asked confused but understood immediately what he was asking about. My cheeks turned warm.
"I could always fight. Remember, all the broken noses you got because of me?" I teased him.
"You mean the way you used to scratch my nose with your fingernails because you were scared of breaking it?" He replied chuckling.
I giggled in response. But, that was so true. All I used to do is scratch him. I grew long sharp nails only for Jason.
We both turned silent lost in our thoughts. I noticed that Jason didn't probe me further for answers and I am grateful for that. Because I don't want to skip my sleep tonight pushing all the bitter memories from my mind.
I just couldn't talk about the abuse or the aftermath to anyone openly till day. Even the specialists had a hard time making me speak.
"You know after coming back from India after... you know. I couldn't sleep at all. The minute I closed my eyes I used to get nightmares. I was so scared to fall asleep because I don't want to experience it all over again. Sometimes I couldn't distinguish between dreams and reality. They seemed so real." I found myself blurting out to Jason.
I took a deep breath and blinked my eyes to keep my tears at bay. My palms turned clammy. I started wiping my palms on my dark-washed jeans. Jason clasped my hand in his and squeezed a little, telling me he is there for me and it's okay.
"So Kristina took me to a lot of doctors, psychiatrists, sleep specialists. But nothing helped. It continued for months. Panic attacks became a regular part of my life." I took a deep breath trying not to choke with emotion.
"Just if someone I'm not comfortable with starts speaking with me or came near me my anxiety used to surge. I used to get afraid of boys or strangers around me... even in school." My voice choked as I spoke with all the bitter memories rolling in front of my eyes, but I felt like I should go on to tell him everything and get it off my chest.
Jason's hold tightened around my arm. "Oh, kitty" he whispered. I noticed that the car is not moving but parked at the side.
"Then Kristina suggested me to take self-defense classes thinking it might reduce my anxiety around people. And that helped me a lot to reduce my anxiety and panic attacks. I slowly started gaining back confidence and even my nightmares started to lessen and over the next few months, I'm back to normal. I get them rarely now but I'm okay." I said giving a small forceful smile.
Jason's hand left mine and wrapped his arm around my shoulders pulling me close, gently rubbing my arm. Despite the heaviness in my stomach, it fluttered at the closeness, the warmth his body generated.
I sank into the warmth of his side not wanting to leave. It felt so right with him, and sharing my deep buried thoughts with him made my pain lessen.
But Jason broke the hug and stared into my eyes with a deep gaze, that brought color to my cheeks and butterflies in my stomach. He placed his palm on my chin drawing circles on my cheek with his dumb.
"I am sorry that I'm not there for you when you need me. But I can't tell you how happy I am feeling right now seeing you overcome this. I'm so proud of you."
"You saved me that night Jason. I tried with all my might to escape but he was just too strong for me. I should be the one thanking you." I thanked him genuinely remembering that I never thanked him for what he had done and pulled him for an embrace.
After breaking the hug, Jason sat mum in his seat without starting the car lost in his thoughts. His thinking face on with narrowed eyebrows and his frown got deeper with each passing second.
"I learned martial arts too just for your information if you want to pull some pranks in the future," I said wanting to turn the mood light.
"Oh you can never win against me baby" he replied smirking and started the ride back home.
"So you still get nightmares?" He asked unexpectedly after a while.
I turned to look at him. Is he still thinking about that?
"Yeah sometimes. Very rare though maybe if something triggers my memory I think." I said shrugging my shoulders.
After reaching home I wished Jason good night and slipped into my room. I lay awake in my bed feeling content and confused at the same time. I never spoke to anyone about my trauma and nightmares.
Only Kristina, Peter, and Ryan know about them. I never told Sophie too. But I know Ryan told her all about it. And she has been the same caring friend as always without asking any questions.
Even today I never intended to speak about it with Jason. But soon caught myself letting out everything. May be simply the fact that it's Jason who saved me that night Or I'm turning to be more comfortable around him these days. Nevertheless, it felt as if a weight has been lifted from my shoulders.
******
Monday in class, Mr.Payne our interior design professor taught us about different types of lights and how their position will affect the total space. Kevin and Mandy kept listening intently to the whole class while Zack kept kicking my leg from behind under the chairs disturbing me. Reeva who sat beside Zack poked him with her mechanical pencil to stop him.
That turned Zack's attention to her and kept pulling her purple hair while she kept poking him. What a disturbing set of friends I have! After the class, the professor gave one annoying glare to the duo and left the class.
I turned around to face Zack and punched him on his shoulder.
"Jesus woman!" He cried out rubbing his shoulder.
"You are falling in the bad books of Mr.Payne and pulling us all too. Remember, we have another class with him next semester too and he even controls the grades on our project." I kinda shouted at him irritated with his annoying behavior in class, a few heads turned towards us because of the commotion I caused.
"Okay okay, I get it, cool down Jones" Zack replied raising his hands in the air showing defeat.
After lunch, Zack skipped his CAD class. This boy is getting on my nerves lately. Why did he even join college if all he wants is to skip classes and go around shoving his tongue in a random girl's throat?
Mr.Payne even gave a group assignment for the month. We have to prepare a presentation on any one type of interior design style. We decided to discuss the topic we are choosing after the CAD class but Mr.Jerkface is mia as usual.
Kevin tried calling him a couple of times but he didn't answer. I snatched the phone from Kevin's hand and typed a message to Zack.
*where the hell are you?. We planned to discuss and finalize the presentation topic. Get your ass here to the McD within 10minutes or I'm going to ask Mr.Payne to remove you from the group.*
And.. sent it.
*feisty! who is this? Definitely not Kevin. Reeva? Jones? or Mandy?*
Maddened by his response. I turned to my other group mates and said "Let's continue without him. It's a waste of time to wait for him."
The ding from the phone in my hand made me open the message from Zack.
*I can't make it today. I swear I will act as a responsible groupmate from tomorrow. 😉*
After 30minutes of discussion torn between Bohemian and Scandinavian design styles at last Bohemian succeeded as a winner.
The presentation should be given after 2weeks, so we got a whole lot of time to dig deeper into the subject. We decided to work on it and exchange notes at McD after class daily and we could meet at my place at weekends.
The next day Zack is absent from class. But to my utter shock, he was already waiting for us at McD, smirking at our surprised faces.
"Come on guys. Let's have some food now. I'm starving." Zack whined for the 10th time in the last 2minutes.
"Shut the frick up, Zack. You are not helping at all." Maddy groaned beside me. I stayed quiet because all I want to do is reach him across the table and rip his spiked hair.
"Let's get some food so that this whiner can shut his mouth," said Reeva smacking Zack behind his head.
After eating our hamburgers/cheeseburgers and finishing our drinks. We started exchanging the points we gathered about Bohemian Style interiors with each other. Mandy took her notepad and started scribbling all the main points. She even wrote the topics we have to cover in the presentation.
Mandy declared that we have to dig information about the respective topics and pass it to her so that she will prepare the ppt. She became the unofficial group lead with Kevin as second in command.
"Can we make a miniature house with a bohemian style interior you know the size of a dollhouse?" Zack said turning all heads to him.
Reeva looked at him as if he had grown 2heads. "What the fuck is wrong with you? Try giving helpful suggestions." She scoffed.
"Everyone is going to do a presentation. What if we have a miniature house decorated in bohemian style. We can make furniture using clay or cardboard and for the fabric, we can rip one of your bohemian scarfs or something. That could gain Mr.Payne's attention."
"I think he is right." Said Mandy deep in thought.
"Not you too! Are we going to play with play-doh now? Mandy, we are in college, not kindergarten." I said banging my hands on the table in exasperation.
"I think we could give it a try. We will make sure to prepare the presentation well but also make a miniature house. It will gather so much attention from everyone." Kevin sided with Mandy.
"Believe it or not this idea is gold," Zack replied arrogantly.
I exchanged a look with Reeva and at last, we both sighed in acceptance. I just hope this idea doesn't bring too much trouble to our group from Mr.Payne.
********
Hello people 😀
So this is the next chapter.
So I just want to give a quick review of how our Amy made it after the assault.
Hope you all liked it.
Love Rami ❤