i am clumsy and clunky and often too loud. i could be a better friend, i could be a better partner, i could be a better sibling. i am full of love in all my messiness and through all the abrasiveness too. i don't know. i like looking at sunsets. i like petting cats on the street and watching trees turn green. my heart is big in my chest and sometimes i have to cradle it and love it even when i'm shying away. i wrap my arms around myself. i watch a fan spin and i guess that i'll just love myself until i mean it.